Happiness .. NOT

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

hello

Aine says:

yup yup

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

I bet you knew I was annoyed as hell just now?

Aine says:

And I wasn't?

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

you? no comments, you're annoyed about something half the time

Aine says:

Well to be honest, wasn't I slightly more annoyed than usual?

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

yes....

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

why?

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

because I was being overly insistent

Aine says:

Why are you being overly insistent anyway

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

because I feel that the reasons you give are not reasonable,

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

and it feels like you're sidelining me because of some trivial issue

Aine says:

I think the reason I'm giving you is the most reasonable.

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

okay lets go really slow

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

state your reasons

Aine says:

I don't want to go because I have to go get my dress done. I don't know why you cannot understand.

Aine says:

That's so important to me.

Aine says:

Don't you know that I've never been to a graduation ball before?

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

I understand that it is excessively important to you

Aine says:

I don't look good in a dress. I want this dress to be oh-so-nice!

Aine says:

I have to get it done before I go back in Easter!!

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

you have 3 weeks before you go back in Easter

Aine says:

ok. let me telly ou what I have to do each weekend

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

tell me how will 3 hrs in my place change that?

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

I say do your shopping on sunday, you say sunday you need to study for TP

Aine says:

week one this week, i have to go and look at paper patterns and material. next weekend, if i have decided on whichever it is i want, i meet up with aunty suan sim. she'll either bring me and BUY the paper patterns and material for me or she'll drag me off to the countryside to look at her new house.

Aine says:

if i haven't yet, then i will go look for stuff again

Aine says:

then next week go with aunty suan sim.

Aine says:

also. like this. three hours in your place is right smack in the middle of the day

Aine says:

which means, one day.

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

what about sundays?

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

what about sundays, kindly tell me what do you do on Sundays?

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

considering you only start studying at 11 p,m?

Aine says:

sundays i try to study for my three test periods.so even if i don't go to london, so then even if i don't study till then, and if i stay at home, i'm happy. if i go to london all day, i'll think later on at night crap, i shouldn't have gone. but if i stayed at home, my mind is at ease

Aine says:

i don't see why you say my reasons are unreasonable.

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

because you could just as easily go to london on sunday

Aine says:

i think it's unreasonable for you to pursue this to such an extreme

Aine says:

yes yes! i could just as easily do that. but i don't want to.

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

and study for your TPs at night

Aine says:

no.

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

that is why i find it unreasonable

Aine says:

i don't think so at all.

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

obviously you won't think so, you need it to be valid

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

or else you would lose the argument

Aine says:

I suppose i have to be in conditon to study, ie not have this weird guilt conscience.

Aine says:

am i losing the argument?

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

you will

Aine says:

why will i

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

if you pursue this any more

Aine says:

then let's pursue it till the cows come home.

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

I just do not want to say anything else

Aine says:

i wont' sleep tonight and i'll still pursue it

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

because I'll piss you off even more

Aine says:

you just did.

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

I'll add to it

Aine says:

try. i'm enjoying this. all the years of people stepping all over me and me being a doormat, you must know that i've got a lot of anger. i need to vent.

Aine says:

piss me off more.

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

if you insist

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

this actually boils down to what your actual intentions are

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

if by saying what you just said, you intend to get me to stop this argument, and I do so in the misbegotten hope of spiting you, then you would have won

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

however, if you said so sincerely, and wish for me to piss you off even more, I could just as easily call your bluff and turn this in to a flame war

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

which if pursued to its end, could me we both lose

Aine says:

well honestly, i don't care if i lose anymore

Aine says:

because you are always so difficult

Aine says:

you're always so sure you're right,and the other person is wrong,

Aine says:

you can be alittle overbearing at times you know

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

definitely

Aine says:

yeah. that's not right.

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

because most of the time, I AM right

Aine says:

no doubt when it comes to academic issues

Aine says:

but when it comes to things like this

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

when it comes to things like this, I present to you the most efficient way to use your time

Aine says:

ok.

Aine says:

how about this if you don't want me to beat around the bush

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

go on

Aine says:

the bottom line is this. you can't force someone to do something they don't want to do when it comes to things like this

Aine says:

so whatevfer you want to say, you won't win either.

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

then just say so

Aine says:

I HAVE BEEN!

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

it's that simple

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

say so to me straight in the face

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

do not go around and around, as no matter how much you think you can argue based on lies, I can smash them

Aine says:

have i not? have i in anyway expressed that i want to go this weekend? or next weekend?

Aine says:

it's not lies.

Aine says:

i would so much prefer to go shopping in london for my dress.

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

you have not expressed in any way you DO NOT want to come

Aine says:

i don't understand how you cannot see.

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

you know me

Aine says:

'i don't want to go i have to go make my dress'

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

that would have been so simple

Aine says:

'no not next weekend'

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

but why don't you say it?

Aine says:

THESE ARE WHAT I HAVE BEEN SAYING

Aine says:

omg.

Aine says:

do you not even listen to what i say?

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

no, you have not been saying that

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

i do listen

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

but you insist upon cloaking your words with all sorts of euphemisms

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

that is something i cannot stand, so I will drill you until you're honest

Aine says:

Are you saying i never said 'i don't want o go'?

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

you NEVER said that

Aine says:

*sigh*

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

you might have IMPLIED that, but you never said it

Aine says:

if i knew i implied it, i don't see why you don't take a hint.

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

and as such, I chose to take your statements at face value and pursue the matter

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

either you would fuss up and simply say no, or you would be forced to come

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

either one is fine by me

Aine says:

right. so now i'm telling you straight to the face that i don't want to come. i need, it's not so much want anymore, i need to get that stupid dress done.

Aine says:

if you look at it from my point of view

Aine says:

you never do that at all, do you? you don't wear anyone else's shoes, even for a moment to see how they're feeling

Aine says:

that's why you don't take hints, that's why you're so overbearing

Aine says:

think about why the dress is important to me

Aine says:

think

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

it's not I don't take, I chose not to take

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

I know what you're hinting

Aine says:

i'm not hinting now am i

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

it's simply me ignoring it because I feel you're being wishy washy and plain inconsiderate

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

I cannot take a maybe as an answer

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

this is not my home

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

if it were, I couldn't care less

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

but here, if you say maybe, I have to hold a space open for yuo

Aine says:

no. we're done with the lunch thing now

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

I am bound by the fact that if I invite you, and if you don't refuse to turn up, I cannot just say you're not turning up and ignore the fact

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

and yes, that's done with

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

now, I see that you need to get your dress done

Aine says:

do you see WHYT

Aine says:

why it's so important to me

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

I do not need to see why, I just need to see your need for it

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

you want to go to a graduation ball

Aine says:

i couldn't care less about the damn ball

Aine says:

it's just an excuse about for the dress.

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

you want a dress

Aine says:

yes but not just any

Aine says:

don't you get it?

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

you need a dress as an attempt to boost up your flagging self image

Aine says:

to put it bluntly yes. so don't need to jumping all over it

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

because you believe that you cannot look good any other way, you have this dire need to get the dress done

Aine says:

yes. i told you earlier, you *were* listening. good.

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

but what I don't see is, why is this need so great that you're willing to skip a friend's invitation

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

but not great enough that you're willing to flunk your TPs for it

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

from what I remember, you've flunked TPs for far less

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

such as waking up late

Aine says:

but... i think it's more important

Aine says:

that's really all that matters you know

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

your dress? or your TPs?

Aine says:

the dress

Aine says:

and i go on saturday anyway. i don't see what the tps have to do withthis

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

you told me you don't go on Sundays because you needed to study for your TPs

Aine says:

yeah i'm not going on sunday!!!

Aine says:

that's why i said "and i go on saturday anyway "

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

ah, but you never told me that

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

you simply gave me a half-assed excuse about needing to study for TPs

Aine says:

and i go on saturday anyway. i don't see what the tps have to do withthis

Aine says:

what on earth is that if you said i never told you iwasnt't going on sunday?

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

only until that message

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

nothing before

Aine says:

how about the , no i don't want to go to london on sunday because i have to study for my test periods?

Aine says:

how about the i don't stay over on saturdays because i want to come back so that sunday i get to be around croydon?

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

THAT's the half-assed excuse I was talking about

Aine says:

IT'S ON A HALF ASSED EXCUSE OK. THAT'S THE DAMN REASON!

Aine says:

you just assume i'm fibbing and no serious because you don't believe me!

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

I never assumed you were fibbing

Aine says:

you have to LISTEN man

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

I knew you were

Aine says:

but that's the reason.

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

cos I know you start studying anywhere from 11 to 1am on Monday morning,

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

I do the same thing

Aine says:

let me just copy and paste, apparently you haven't been listening

Aine says:

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

yes

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

so?

Aine says:

if you don't like the way i think

Aine says:

too bad.

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

that is what i meant by how come your need for a dress can't override the above statement?

Aine says:

having my mind at ease is the most important.

Aine says:

my need for a dress happens to be the reason why i go to london on saturday

Aine says:

i don't see why you can't see it.

Aine says:

but it's alright, considering your earlier statement about not putting yourself in someone else's shoes.

Aine says:

you don't care what they think, don't care how they feel, you're as tactless as they come.

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

and you think you're excessively tactful?

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

your inablility to handle my apparent lack of tact proved nothing

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

by exploding in my face, giving me all sorts of unsubstantiated reasons, and repeating yourself like a broken radio

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

this is not something someone with tact would do

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

so do not label me 'tactless'

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

put yourself in your own shoes and see.

Aine says:

well honestly, i have a lot more tact than you do, and the reasons i give are good enough for me, if they're not enough for you, i can't do anything about it. and i repeat myself because you don't listen.

Aine says:

either that, or you 'KNOW' i'm fibbing

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

I know you're fibbing about studying about TPs on sunday

Aine says:

i'm very tactful. it's just when you want me to stop being nice i have to be tactless

Aine says:

no. that's not at all it. that's a perfectly valid reason.

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

I have to assume that what you say about your peace of mind is true

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

as I cannot attest to that

Aine says:

of course so how can i be fibbing

Aine says:

stop contradicting yourself.

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

I can attest to you not using the entirety of Sunday to study for TPs

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

because I know you don't

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

HOWEVER

Aine says:

HAVE i said i was going to study (have been studying) the whole day sunday every sunday?

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

yes

Aine says:

if you reread the passage.. no wait.. let me copy and paste again .. i have to be the broken record because you don't read.

Aine says:

read the words "so then even if i don't study till then"

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

you told me Quote: I don't wanna go to London on Sunday because I need to study for TPs

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

I am bringing up the issue from before

Aine says:

YES! where does that say that i was going to stay the whole day

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

it implies you're gonna study for the whole day

Aine says:

no.

Aine says:

do not assume that

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

tell me why not

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

then if it does not imply you study for the whole day

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

then why can't you go to london on sundays?

Aine says:

because on sundays, i wake up, i go out and eat, come back and start doing my math homework. then i stdy for my tps at whatever time i start

Aine says:

because i have to stay at home

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

by your earlier statements

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

you can replace everything from I wake up, to come back

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

with " GO TO LONDON TO SORT OUT MY DRESS OF LOST HOPES"

Aine says:

what a low blow.

Aine says:

and no, agani you don't read.

Aine says:

read " but if i stayed at home, my mind is at ease"

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

I READ THAT

Aine says:

or even "so then even if i don't study till then, and if i stay at home, i'm happy."

Aine says:

what's your point

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

I AM NOT ARGUING BASED ON THAT

Aine says:

you really have to stop contradicting yourself.

Aine says:

then what are you basing it on?

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

I AM ARGUING BASED ON WHAT YOU SAID TO ME PERSONALLY

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

NOT WHAT YOU JUST MESSAGED ME

Aine says:

and what did i say, i dontw ant to go to london, study for test periods?

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

yes\

Aine says:

yeah

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

now, do my arguments fall into context?

Aine says:

so read what i said, don't you understand

Aine says:

why don't you see it?

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

yes, I see it

Aine says:

we see things differently. so what's wrong with accepting what other people think? do you scream at christians asking themw hy they believe in jesus? no.

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

that issue about the lunch and london and saturdays is closed

Aine says:

closed.

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

I have no problems with you not coming to lunch

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

I have no problems with you making your dress

Aine says:

lunch was setlled long ago

Aine says:

so was the dress. has nothing to do with you.

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

I do have problems with the way you expressed your unwillingness to come for lunch

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

remember back in sch

Aine says:

how by giving you reasons? reasons that were not excuses, but reasons?

Aine says:

reasons that were valid?

Aine says:

reasons that were exactly how i felt

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

reasons that were not valid

Aine says:

not valid to you, but to me they were

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

if you said what you typed earlier

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

then they would be valid

Aine says:

if i said i don't want to go to your place cos i need to wash my hair, that woudl be valid

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

yes

Aine says:

valid but unreasonable.

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

valid but unreasonable

Aine says:

WAH

Aine says:

SHIT DID YOU SEE THAT

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

if you said, " I can't go to your place b'cos I need to go London to make dress, and I don't want to go on Sundays because I need to stay home for my own peace of mind"

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

that would be both valid AND reasonable

Aine says:

, i don't need to explain myself to you. you ask too much of a person.

Aine says:

the dress thing i really didn't want people to know

Aine says:

you have to sometimes take a hint

Aine says:

and respect that

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

sometimes, the simplest explanations are the best

Aine says:

i don't want anyone to know

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

when xian told me she's busy

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

I accepted that

Aine says:

don't you get it, it's not nice. you just attacked me with a low blow,

Aine says:

i don't want other people doign the same

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

I retract that

Aine says:

don't you see why i don't want people to know?

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

YES

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

I see.

Aine says:

geez. the reason why i wasn't so forthcoming was because id idn't want you to know

Aine says:

went last saturday to look for the dress already what.

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

then just say you're busy la

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

so difficult?

Aine says:

and when i said i had to go to london to see ym brother to get the phone, which was perfectly valid as ch leaves tomorrow for kl, it meant i was busy

Aine says:

if i had say i was busy, you would have asked why

Aine says:

and then i would have given you that explanation.

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

and if you said it was private

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

do you think I would have pressed you for one?

Aine says:

yes. i honestly do

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

no, I wouldn't

Aine says:

well i didn't know that imisjudged you sosrry

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

if you say it's private, I would have shut up

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

it's not like I NEED you to come

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

I LIKE you to come, but not NEED

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

say you're on private business, and I would have just wished you well and went on to find someone else

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

I trust you sufficiently, so if you say private, I won't enquire as I know it will not involve me in any shape or form

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

do you get my reasoning?

Aine says:

Now i know

Aine says:

I didn't know earlier.

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

you should know that if you want to give me the details, they must be sufficiently water-tight, as I have the annoying habit of picking them apart

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

I don't NEED to know the details, and neither would I LIKE to know them

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

unless it's my last supper or something, then I might me mre insistent

Aine says:

when you try to pick them apart, it's like i give reasons, but only bits here and there and you don't get it, so when i explain it, you understand it but then you know the reasons, that were meant to be private.

Aine says:

i assume by giving you the bits here and there, you should be pacified, most people would me, and so.. you aren't most people. my bad

One by one, the leaves fall...(DINNER) says:

best is simply tell me it's private and leave it at that

One by one, the leaves fall...(DINNER) says:

if I want to find out about your private life, I'd ask someone else

Aine says:

what i don't get is why you never let things drop

Aine says:

when someone shows that they have osmething else to do, you push it

One by one, the leaves fall...(DINNER) says:

I never let things drop.

One by one, the leaves fall...(DINNER) says:

that's why I get things done

One by one, the leaves fall...(DINNER) says:

who says I push it if someone tells me I have something to do?

One by one, the leaves fall...(DINNER) says:

lemme see

One by one, the leaves fall...(DINNER) says:

last week

Aine says:

but if you let things drop.. a lot of people will be happier, you don't have to spend your life arguing with people.

One by one, the leaves fall...(DINNER) says:

you said cannot, I let it drop

One by one, the leaves fall...(DINNER) says:

xian said no way, I let THAT drop as well

One by one, the leaves fall...(DINNER) says:

this time

One by one, the leaves fall...(DINNER) says:

said cannot, WOW, I let that drop.

Aine (dinner) says:

i don't understand.

One by one, the leaves fall...(DINNER) says:

Last week, I asked you all if you wanted to come for lunch

One by one, the leaves fall...(DINNER) says:

you said dun wan, cos busy and xian not coming

One by one, the leaves fall...(DINNER) says:

did I push it?

One by one, the leaves fall...(DINNER) says:

xian said busy, did I push it?

Aine (dinner) says:

yes

Aine (dinner) says:

you pushed it forward, to this coming week

Aine (dinner) says:

so you are pushing it

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

I am not 'pushing it' on you, so to speak

Aine says:

not anymore

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

unless you simply meant pushing it forward

Aine says:

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

in which case, is something which is perfectly fine

Aine says:

you're still pushing the issue that we go.

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

I'm not pushing the issue that you all go

Aine says:

you are.

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

I'm merely pushing the date forward

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

what's the wrong with rescheduling?

Aine says:

are you not? well you're not anymore

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

you're being excessively oblique, explain

Aine says:

it's like this

Aine says:

if you dropped it, you wouldn't have said how about next week

Aine says:

what's this desperate need for people to go over to your house and eat?

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

there is no need

Aine says:

then don't push it

Aine says:

don't reschedule.

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

just re-invite

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

simpler

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

but then again, have you ever consider my needing ppl to come over might be similiar to you needing a dress?

Aine says:

YES I KNOW

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

I'm merely trying to be charitable

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

if you all don't like it then fine

Aine says:

i thought maybe..

Aine says:

let's go

Aine says:

we go and then gets compliments

Aine says:

but then I NEED a dress..

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

I'm paranoid and I don't trust others because of this

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

this is PRECISELY why I don't trust other ppl

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

and looking at it, the experiment can go out of the window

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

few ppl are worth trusting

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

everything is off

One by one, the leaves fall... says:

forget it in this case

And by now, the tree is bare. says:

I just need to cancel out with the others

Aine says:

Fine by me.